Category Archives: September 2012

NEW YEAR’S GREETINGS

L’Shana Tova! May the members of Congregation Aitz Chaim have a blessed and sweet new year. — Beverly Tatz

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YES, MIKY, THERE ARE RABBIS IN MONTANA — THE NEW YORK TIMES

EDITOR’S NOTE: At the time this was written, there was not a full time rabbi in Billings. This is a few years old, but still interesting, and new to me.

TIPS FOR AN EASY FAST

(See also the Segal Guide to Fasting for Yom Kippur, from which these tips are taken.)

  • DON’T GET THIRSTY
  • DON’T START THE PRE-FAST MEAL ON A FULL STOMACH
  • EAT FOODS THAT ARE DIGESTED SLOWLY
  • DON’T GET A HEADACHE
  • MAKE THE MEAL TASTY ENOUGH SO PEOPLE WILL EAT
  • DON’T DO A COMPLETE FAST IF YOU HAVE CERTAIN MNEDICAL PROBLEMS
  • DON’T EAT IMPROPERLY AFTER NEILA

Have an easy fast.

OTHER TIMELY REMINDERS

  • Please bring nonperishable items for the Food Bank to Kol Nidre or Yom Kippur Services, September 25-26. Examples of such items are canned meats, vegetables, and soups, as well as cereal, rice, tuna, macaroni and cheese, and powdered milk.
  • Nadyne and Jerry Weissman will host Student Rabbi miriam Farber for dinner before Erev Yom Kippur services the evening of September 25.
  • The Election of officers for the year 2012-2013 will take place between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. Up for re-election are Aaron (treasurer), Nadyne (secretary), Bruce (Vice-President), and Stuart (board member at large.) Ballots will be distributed before Rosh Hashanah and tabulated and announced during the break-the-fast meal after Yom Kippur.
  • Erev Sukkot is Sunday, September 30. Sukkot days 1-7 are Monday, October 1 through Sunday, October 7.
  • The MAJCO Shabbaton will be in Billings the week end of October 19-21. Aitz Chaim congregants wishing to attend the Shabbaton should refer to the registration form for more details. The deadline for registration is Monday, October 15, 2012.
  • Student Rabbi Miriam Farber will return to Great Falls to lead services the weekend of November 16-18, 2012.

5773 YOM KIPPUR SCHEDULE

Sheet music:  Kol Nidre

Image by Center for Jewish History, NYC via Flickr

All services are led by Student Rabbi Miriam Farber

Tuesday, September 25

  • Kol Nidre services are 7:00 P.M. at the Bethel, 1009 18th Ave SW, Great Falls

Wednesday, September 26

  • Yom Kippur services begin on Wednesday morning, September 26 at 10:00 A.M. at the Bethel, 1009 18th Ave SW, Great Falls.
    • 10:00 A.M. — 12:00 P.M. Morning Services
    • 12:00 P.M. — 2:30 P.M.: 2-1/2 hour break
    • 2:30 P.M. — 4:00 P.M. Discussion on Jonah led by Student Rabbi Miriam Farber
    • 4:00 P.M. — 4:30 P.M.: 1-2 hour break
    • 4:30 P.M. — 5:30 P.M. Yizkor
    • 5:30 P.M. — 6:15 P.M. Neilah
    • 6:30 P.M.: Break The Fast milchig (dairy) pot luck.

WALTER GREENSPAN (12/20/1945 — 08/13/2012)

EDITOR’S NOTE: Adapted from a blog on the web.

Walter Greenspan was a Jewish resident of Great Falls, MT, and Jerico, NY. He passed away on August 13, 2012, at 66 years of age, after a sudden illness.
Walter was born in Brooklyn, NY, on December 20, 1945, to Jack and Beatrice GREENSPAN. He had a keen wit and an astute mind. He was formerly a commodities analyst. Walter was also involved with Metro NY Genealogy for the past decade. He is survived by two adult twin daughters.

THE SEGAL GUIDE TO FASTING FOR YOM KIPPUR (FROM A MEDICAL PERSPECTIVE)

The Segal Guide to Fasting for Yom Kippur (From a Medical Perspective)

Michael M. Segal MD PhD

Each year on Yom Kippur, Jews wish each other a khatima tova (a good seal in the Book of Life) and tolerable fast. The route to a khatima tova is beyond the scope of this article; the route to an easy fast is simpler to describe. The following are the essentials of human physiology that will help you have a tolerable fast on Yom Kippur:

  • DON’T GET THIRSTY:
  • Most people think the difficulty about fasting is feeling “hungry”. However, avoiding thirst is much more important for how you feel. Not only do you avoid the discomfort of thirst, but you are also well hydrated and swallow frequently, so your stomach does not feel as empty.

    One important way to remain well hydrated is to avoid drinks or foods that cause your body to get rid of water. Such foods and drinks include alcohol, tea, caffeinated coffee and chocolate. Another important rule is to avoid consuming much salt (sodium chloride). Salt causes a person to feel thirsty despite having a “normal” amount of water, because extra water is needed for the extra salt. For this reason you should avoid processed foods containing lots of salt such as pickles, cold cuts, or cheese. Most tomato sauces, salad dressing, canned fish and smoked fish have a lot of added salt. Since Kosher meat has a high salt content, it may be best to choose a main course such as fresh fish, canned no-salt tuna fish or a de-salted meat such as boiled chicken.

    By avoiding these types of foods and drinks in the several hours before a fast, you can avoid either losing water or needing extra water. Other actions that cause the body to lose water, such as perspiring in warm clothing, should also be avoided during the fast.

  • DON’T START THE PRE-FAST MEAL ON A FULL STOMACH:
  • The pre-fast meal often begins at 5 PM, so a large lunch could prevent you from eating enough immediately before the fast. It is best to have a small lunch, or no lunch at all. A large breakfast early in the day based on cereals, breads and fruits can provide the energy you need during the day, yet these high-fiber foods will be far downstream by the time of the pre-fast meal and will not keep you from eating enough food at the pre-fast meal. A large breakfast is also helpful because it stretches the stomach. After eating breakfast, it is best to consume beverages during the day. This will not fill you up, since liquids are absorbed quickly, and this will ensure that you have absorbed enough fluids during the day to start the pre-fast meal being well hydrated. Be sure to avoid beverages with alcohol or caffeine. You should also drink at least two glasses of fluids with the pre-fast meal, because many foods need extra water to be digested properly.

  • EAT FOODS THAT ARE DIGESTED SLOWLY:
  • Include some foods high in oils and fats in the pre-fast meal, since such foods delay emptying of the stomach and effectively prolong your meal. However, beware of fatty meats or salted potato chips that could load you up with too much salt. Salads and other high fiber foods that are so important in one’s normal diet should be de-emphasized for the pre-fast meal, since they travel quickly through the digestive system. Fruit, despite its high fiber content, is worthwhile, since it carries a lot of water in a “time-release” form. Avocados or salt-free potato chips, despite containing a lot of potassium, are good choices, because the body largely handles potassium by taking it up into cells.

  • DON’T GET A HEADACHE:
  • Withdrawing from caffeine produces a headache in people who drink several cups of coffee a day. If you consume this much caffeine in coffee or other foods or drinks you should prepare yourself for the caffeine-free period by reducing or eliminating caffeine from your diet in the days before Yom Kippur. Don’t try to get through the fast by drinking coffee right before Kol Nidre, since this will cause you to lose a lot of water.

  • MAKE THE MEAL TASTY ENOUGH SO PEOPLE WILL EAT:
  • The pre-fast meal doesn’t have TO be bland. Spices such as lemon or herbs are fine for fasting, but salt and monosodium glutamate should be reduced as much as possible.

  • DON’T DO A COMPLETE FAST IF YOU HAVE CERTAIN MNEDICAL PROBLEMS:
  • People with medical conditions such as diabetes should consult their doctors and rabbis before fasting. Certain medications need to be taken during Yom Kippur, and it is important to swallow them with enough water to avoid pills getting stuck on the way to the stomach and damaging the esophagus. Fasting by women who are pregnant or breast feeding can also be dangerous. If a young person who has not fasted much before has unusual difficulty fasting, you should discuss this with your doctor since this happens in some serious metabolic problems in which fasting can be very dangerous.

  • DON’T EAT IMPROPERLY AFTER NEILA:
  • Even people who have prepared well for fasting will be hungry after Neila. Be sure not to eat food too quickly at the post-fast meal. Begin the break-fast meal with several glasses of milk or juice: these put sugar into the bloodstream and occupy space in the stomach, discouraging you from eating too rapidly. Also be careful about eating high salt foods such as lox, since you will still be a little dehydrated and will need to drink a lot of fluids to avoid waking up extremely thirsty in the early morning hours. Expect to drink as much fluid in the post-fast evening as you drink in a regular day.

These preparations for the fast of Yom Kippur will be different from your normal routine, but they can serve as a concrete reminder of the approaching Day of Atonement.

Copyright © 1989 – 2012 Michael M. Segal, MD, PhD. This document may be reproduced freely on a non-profit basis, including electronically, through 2011 as long as the source at http://www.segal.org/kippur/ is indicated and this copyright notice is included.

MANUFACTURER RECALL OF DEFECTIVE HUMAN BEINGS

Now that we have joyfully welcomed in the New Year 5773, it is time to turn our attention to more serious matters, such as the following recall notice:

The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart.

This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units.

This defect has been technically termed “Subsequential Internal Non-Morality” or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.

Some other symptoms include:

1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion

The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect. The manufacturer has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.

The number to call for repair in all areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R (tollfree)

Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure.

Next, download ATONEMENT into the heart component. No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, it will be replaced with:

1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control

Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers’ Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.

WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list here, and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.

Thank you for your attention!
Signed
GOD

TWO VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITIES

Please bring nonperishable donations for the Food Bank to services either Tuesday evening September 25, or Wednesday morning, September 26. Examples of such items are canned meats, vegetables, and soups, as well as cereal, rice, tuna, macaroni and cheese and powdered milk. Helen will collect and distribute them to the Food Bank.

Also, someone is needed to host the rabbi for dinner erev Yom Kippor.

A PRAYER FOR 5773

A PRAYER FOR 5773

May you relax about the Third Millennium of the Common Era, and realize that you still have 227 years until the dawn of the Sixth Millennium of the Jewish Calendar, by which time the computer will be long since obsolete and so will you.

May God give you the strength to go through a year of presidential campaigning, and may some of the promises made be kept.

May you believe at least half of what the candidates propose, and may those elected fulfill at least half of what they promise, and may the miracle of reducing taxes and balancing budgets actually happen.

May what you see in the mirror delight you, and what others see in you delight them.

May someone love you enough to forgive your faults, be blind to your blemishes, and tell the world about your virtues.

May the telemarketers wait to make their sales calls until you finish dinner, and may your check book and your budget balance, and may they include generous amounts for charity.

May you remember to say “I love you” at least once a day to your spouse, your child, your parent; but not to your secretary, your nurse, your masseuse, your hairdresser or your tennis instructor.

May God grant you the Senility to forget the people you never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones you do like, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

And may the Messiah come this year, and if he does not, may we live as if he has, in a world at peace and with the awareness of God’s love in every sunset, every flower’s unfolding petals, every baby’s smile, every lover’s kiss, and every wonderful, astonishing, miraculous beat of your heart.